How to Spell Chanukah...And Other Holiday Dilemmas: 18 Writers Celebrate 8 Nights of Lights

How to Spell Chanukah
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And then, perhaps nibbling on a leftover pancake or trying—yet again—the plasticky gelt, I will curl up with a good book.

Emily Franklin

May you enjoy doing the same. And yes, of course, it, too, is a holiday that recalls an incident in which a mighty king decided that the Jews of the time were having too much luck or fun or prosperity. And yes, of course, this resulted in mass bloodshed throughout the streets of Judea. But unlike Yom Kippur and Rosh Hashanah, it was always made clear that the story behind Chanukah held relatively little significance.

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How to Spell Chanukah And Other Holiday Dilemmas: 18 Writers Celebrate 8 Nights of Lights [Emily Franklin] on giuliettasprint.konfer.eu *FREE* shipping on qualifying . Editorial Reviews. From Publishers Weekly. Despite a cheery title, the writers in this odd little How to Spell Chanukah And Other Holiday Dilemmas: 18 Writers Celebrate 8 Nights of Lights - Kindle edition by Emily Franklin. Download it once .

And I always appreciated that. It was about a guy named Judah Maccabaeus and his four brothers and how they rebelled against King Antiochus because he ordered the chosen people to reject God and all their Jewish customs. After three years of gorging each other with spears and swords, the Maccabees won the war and the Syrians were forced out of Judea, which would become Israel.

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The result of this miracle for me was that my horrific school was closed for a week, a mountain of gift-wrapped boxes formed in my living room, Rudolph and Santa Claus were both on TV in Claymation form, and not once did anyone tell me to fast. Even my Moroccan-born yeshiva teachers were in good moods, showing us their tobacco-stained smiles for the first time since Purim.

Each December when the Chanukah winter break arrived, the principal, Rabbi Litsky, would hand us a gift as we got on the bus that Friday. I called them Chocolate Jews, but they were Judah Maccabaeus—shaped candies wrapped in blue-and-white tinfoil. What a holiday! No pestilence, no slavery, no locusts, no cattle disease or atonement. No synagogue, no guilt, no mortar, and no real lesson to be absorbed and passed down to my Jewish offspring.

Chanukah was merely the blue team in the color war against the mighty red team, Christmas. We were smaller and got way less press, but who could deny that eight days of presents was oh so much better than one?

All that buildup they had with the chimney and the cookies and the sleigh bells ringing and it was over in a New York minute. But with all the obvious differences, I always thought the two holidays had quite a bit in common as well. Both were intended to be religious events but seemed less about God and more about the mall. Both had bearded men on their respective wrapping paper, both had just dynamite, knee-tapping songs written for them, and both were celebrations of truly brave Jews.

I think the dome of the building was made of a Tupperware fruit bowl and the tan walls were cardboard, and I remember maroon carpeting and a bimah with pulpits. I set up all the evil Syrians in battle formation, making them surround the synagogue with spears in hand. Then I removed the dome so I could reach inside the sanctuary and set up the Jews. Some of them were slump-shouldered and actually had sorrowful expressions on their faces, and to this day I have no idea where my mother found a toy store that sold sad, davening action figures.

But she did. So the scenario was simple.

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The Jews want to pray, the Syrians want to kill and pillage, and the Maccabees want to protect the melancholy action figures. It was all about timing. My role was simple and I was very good at it: play God.

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Luckily for me, I spent heaps of time in school learning how the almighty, blessed be He, handled things when he lost his temper. You had to first let the drama build. This meant the tiny Jews start their service. All they want to do is pray. Next, you need the Syrians to surround the Temple.

After that, you need your Maccabees to get into slaughter formation. And lastly, with the bad guys in the windows and the good guys ready to defend Judea, the war begins. Reckless Rites reassesses the historical interpretation of Jewish violence--from the alleged massacre of thousands of Christians in seventh-century Jerusalem to later medieval attacks on Christian symbols such as the crucifix, transgressions that were often committed in full knowledge that their likely consequence would be death.

A book that calls for major changes in the way that Jewish history is written and conceptualized, Reckless Rites will be essential reading for scholars and students of history, religion, and Jewish-Christian relations. With this hilarious parody Haggadah from the comedic minds of Dave Barry, Alan Zweibel, and Adam Mansbach, good Jews everywhere will no longer have to sit and sleep through a lengthy and boring Seder.

You then eat a celebratory brisket and wrap up the whole evening by taking at least forty-five minutes to say good-bye to everyone. Edith Hahn was an outspoken young woman in Vienna when the Gestapo forced her into a ghetto and then into a slave labor camp. When she returned home months later, she knew she would become a hunted woman and went underground. With the help of a Christian friend, she emerged in Munich as Grete Denner.

There she met Werner Vetter, a Nazi Party member who fell in love with her. Despite Edith's protests and even her eventual confession that she was Jewish, he married her and kept her identity a secret. In wrenching detail, Edith recalls a life of constant, almost paralyzing fear. She tells how German officials casually questioned the lineage of her parents; how during childbirth she refused all painkillers, afraid that in an altered state of mind she might reveal something of her past; and how, after her husband was captured by the Soviets, she was bombed out of her house and had to hide while drunken Russian soldiers raped women on the street.

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Despite the risk it posed to her life, Edith created a remarkable record of survival. She saved every document, as well as photographs she took inside labor camps. In this enlightening biography, Joseph Telushkin offers a captivating portrait of the late Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson, a towering figure who saw beyond conventional boundaries to turn his movement, Chabad-Lubavitch, into one of the most dynamic and widespread organizations ever seen in the Jewish world.

From his modest headquarters in Crown Heights, Brooklyn, the Rebbe advised some of the world's greatest leaders and shaped matters of state and society.

"How to Spell Chanukah..."

Statesmen and artists as diverse as Ronald Reagan, Robert F. More broadly, it examines how he became in effect an ambassador for Jews globally, and how he came to be viewed by many as not only a spiritual archetype but a savior. Telushkin also delves deep into the more controversial aspects of the Rebbe's leadership, analyzing his views on modern science and territorial compromise in Israel, and how in the last years of his life, many of his followers believed that he would soon be revealed as the Messiah, a source of contention until this day.

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